pookabox | i like your messy hair, i like the clothes you wear

i like your messy hair, i like the clothes you wear

[ A week passes with two spirits and one human as residents of the enormous Workshop, dining with North whenever he appears out of his office but generally doing their own thing in the meantime. Jack flies off now and again to spread snow and wintry cheer, tactfully letting Dave and Hiccup some time to get to know each other now that both of them are rubbing along better than could have been hoped. He hasn't seen much of either of them separately, so Hiccup wandering the Workshop corridors far below Jack (where he sits atop the Globe playing with a puzzlebox) in the new clothes the winter spirit procured for him from a high street store a couple of days ago, is definitely a head-turner.

Oh no, he's hot. Hotter.

Hiccup looks not entirely unlike the way he does in his flight-suit, only ... casual, cut and shaped into modern-day clothing in a way that has Jack staring (fitted brown leather jacket, bottle-green leather pants with laces up the sides so they can be adjusted to those skinny legs), puzzlebox dropped forgotten atop the North Pole as he sweeps down to land in front of him. He drapes his staff over a shoulder as he hops onto the carpet, a hand stuffing inside his hoodie pocket as he ducks his head with a greeting smile. ]

So where've you been all morning, lazybones? It's almost noon.

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I didn't know my place for a long time, there's no rush. You already know you are about Freedom, it doesn't have to be conventional. [ Leaning back in order to see him, Jack wipes some of the condensation on the leather jacket, casually freezing it. ] You're brave without being too reckless and that's rare. If I were a kid, I'd look up to you if I was feeling trapped or too insignificant to pull myself out of my problems, because you've been there. You care.

You're a Guardian, whatever you already do is what's needed.

[Yeah, he's definitely been there. The docks after the kill ring immediately comes to mind when he listens to Jack, but Astrid had really been the one who pulled him out of that helplessness he'd been feeling at the time. Hiccup slides his hands down from the back of Jack's head, resting them on his shoulders and watching him freeze the condensation.]

See, it sounds easy when you say it like that. I just...have trouble putting it into words. This whole thing is...I know I was made years ago but it feels like I was only meant to start now.

There's nothing wrong with that. I spent three-hundred years doing my own thing.

[ Trailing his nails along Hiccup's leathers, Jack find the inner curve of his thigh and scratches there in a mirror of the scars left beneath. His icy nails tear through the top lining ever so slightly in thin lines, just enough to have the touch felt. ]

You should stay here for now, where it's safe ...

[He lets out a small hiss when he feels nails scratch at him through his pants, squeezing his fingers around Jack's shoulders. Hiccup's brow furrows slightly, rocking his hips forward a little out of familiarity towards chilly touches there.]

Is that why you do that? Leave scratches on me?

[ He slides his arm around Hiccup, cinching him in at the waist. ]

Nah, I just enjoy it. [ Jack laughs as he fails to keep a straight face and shrugs, nudging them to sit and enjoy the fireside picnic. ] You're not the only one that knows my smell, or scent, or whatever. It's pretty distinct. You'll always carry it with you now even if it's too faint for your nose to pick up, there are creatures out there who'll know you're taken without having to wonder at all.

[He sits where nudged, wrapping his arm around the other spirit's waist and tugging him closest he can lean on him. There's a few croissants mixed in with the meats and fruit, something he remembers Jack liking that one time he went and got breakfast in bed. It's these that Hiccup reaches for, passing one off to his husband. The explanation gets a raised eyebrow but he smiles.]

So you're scenting me, is that what you're saying? Basically telling other spirits 'This is mine, back off'?

No, don't be stupid. That sounds so medieval.

[ Except he is, but won't admit it. He tears into the croissant and leans over to peck Hiccup on the cheek for remembering, settling in against him to offer some to his lips after shredding the pastry. ]

Spirits are weird and I don't want anything to happen to you.

You forget I'm from before medieval.

[According to Dave and North anyway. Hiccup isn't too sure of how those things go anyway. He takes the offered pastry even though he has his own, tilting his head to press a kiss to Jack's jaw after as he chew.]

You're right. I already let one weird spirit into my life and look what happened to me.

[He's joking, he's joking.]

We'll get you up to speed on timelines, medieval is ... it sucked. Black Plague, not a lot of fun across half the world.

[ Jack munches the leftover croissant, snorting. He knows Hiccup is being light-hearted about ... everything, so he eases into the same humor. ]

You got to see his good-looking face almost every day, for a while?

[He tears into his own pastry with dragon teeth, wincing a little as he hears that. That sounds worse than eel pox. Hiccup curls his arm around Jack's waist, finding his free hand and slipping his fingers through his, nuzzling white hair.]

I'd like to wake up to it again if he'll permit it.

[He's choosing his words carefully, not wanting to upset the light hearted mood and get his husband moody again. Hiccup snuffles his way down a neck, kissing the crook there as he tilts his head to look at Jack with warm eyes.]

[ The nuzzles are lovely, especially as he nibbles a few slices of apple to clean off the sticky sweetness of his fingers. Even without the kisses to his neck, the way Hiccup looks at him is enough to have his stomach flipping, trailing two fingers under his husband's chin to tilt it up for a chaste kiss that lingers. ]

I'm still in love with you. [ Being a dork, being scared of the new world, being nostalgic and sweet and remembering croissants in leather jackets. Jack pecks his lips again. ] And I still want you.

[Hiccup lets his lips linger against Jack's, words murmured sweetly against them as Jack speaks. His lashes flutter, a small, warm breath breathing out from his open mouth. His stomach flips every time Jack tells him they're okay and that he still loves him, remembering the encounter on the beach. It's that that causes him to take great care in what he says, tilting his head to kiss the fingers under his chin.

He doesn't want to see Jack that angry or upset again.]

I never stopped being in love with you. You're everything to me, Jack, you always have been.

[ He'll always be a little angry with Hiccup for sleeping for so long, through so much personal grief he should have been around to help, but logically Jack knows it wasn't his husband's fault. Most likely. He trusts him, and he's missed him, and there's no one else (not even Dave) that Jack loves more because Hiccup is his first, his Boy, the one who gave up his entire life for this eternity together. That's the tall truth of it. ]

I know. Ever since I met you, you've been the center of my whole world. [ A slice of apple taps Hiccup on the lips as Jack smiles at him. ] We have a lot of lost time to make up for. I don't ever want to stop touching you.

[ The nuzzle of their noses, for example; even the barest caress is welcome. ]

[He'll always be angry at himself for being susceptible to the hibernation spell, for not waking up when Jack needed him, for not being there at any point in the last thousand years that he has to make up for. He nips the apple from Jack's fingers, returning the nose nuzzling before pecking his husband on the lips.]

I'll spend every day with you if I have to. [Hiccup flicks his tongue against the corner of Jack's mouth teasingly.] Every minute of every second of every hour. I want to wake up wrapped around you again. I want to wake up and look at your face and be reminded of how lucky I am to have you.

Hiccup ...

[ Turning his head into the curve of a shoulder to hide, Jack stays there curled up against him, long legs bent. His hand brushes back through soft chestnut hair, tickling idly at the nape on Hiccup's other side as he glancingly kisses the scruff along a jaw. ]

I miss you.

[ Present-tense, since it feels strange not to entirely remember what it's like to be with him. ]

I miss you too.

[For Hiccup, the past was just a few months ago. He still remembers how to love Jack, how to hold him in his arms and murmur sweet nothings continuously in his ears. He's patient, though, and he'll only work with whatever Jack feels comfortable with. His fingers curl in his husband's hoodie as his jaw is kissed, tilting his head forward into it with a small sigh as his eyes close, tipping his head forward to press a kiss to Jack's forehead, reaching to cradle his mate close.]

[ As lanky as his body is, he finds it easy to curl up just so in those arms and feel the world slip away outside their circle, unimportant. Hearing and feeling Hiccup sigh, then the forehead kiss, Jack holds onto him just as possessively. ]

I ... [ Hesitantly, he swallows. ] I think I need to go back to the den. Just to ... to see it. To know you're not still there.

[ He can't reach back and find the happier memories anymore, not when all the most recent ones are of separation and anxiety. ]

Could we go there?

[ It was always more Hiccup's territory than it was Jack's, technically, and they've been apart so long ... ]

[His breath hitches a little when he hears Jack say that, resting his chin on his husband's head. He hasn't been back to the den since he woke, not wanting to go back there without Jack. Hiccup lowers his head, nuzzling the winter sprite's cheek.]

We can.

[It's said so simply but he wraps his arms around Jack tightly, kissing the hairline at the front of his head reassuringly.]

I'm here, I promise, but we can go there if it'll make you feel better.

I don't know about that, [ about it making me feel better, ] but I think I have to see it one more time. With you.

[ Instead of looking at it and Hiccup there, left behind. Jack reaches up with both hands as he twists around to put himself in Hiccup's lap, knees either side of hips, and wraps his arms around a neck to bury away from everything in the heat of a neck. Guilt lines his voice. ]

It was so long ago, I ... I can't remember what we were really like. I might be imagining parts of it, I don't know. It drove me mad trying, so I gave up.

[He doesn't mind it when Jack squirrels his way into his lap, raising his hand to rub warm fingers along his back comfortingly. Hiccup keeps his husband close, even as he hears that with the guilty tone of Jack's voice. He buries his nose into the crook of a neck, indoor picnic forgotten as he presses reassuring kisses to Jack's throat, pulling his head back to look at him.]

It was only a couple of months ago for me. [The words are murmured guiltily, caught in his throat before he clears it, fingers grazing up to Jack's chin to brush the backs along his jaw.] I could jog your memory, if you'd like...?

[ Long lashes flutter as he tilts his head into the unfurling caress along his cheek, wondering how lovely it would be to think everything between them was only a couple of months ago; that would be bliss.

Jack doesn't cry, despite the dampness collecting in his eyes and the soft uncertainty threading through both his voice and drawn shoulders. ]

What if I'm different?

[ Different to what you like? Will he be as good as Hiccup thinks, if that's the case? He doesn't know. It's like trying to copy an old, worn-out painting when you don't have the right paintbrush. ]

Listen to me.

[Hiccup pulls his other hand up to cup both of Jack's cheeks into his palms, thumbs brushing along the curve, in towards tear ducts and away again gently.]

I don't care if you're different. I don't care if you remember things differently to how I know they were. You're my husband, my mate, my soul mate. We can start over, make new memories, relearn each other.

[He smiles a little sadly.]

I'll be there next time when you get battered and broken, and I'll nurse you back to health. I'll be here when you need me. I'm not going anywhere, Jack. You'll have to drop a dragon on me to stop me from coming for you.

[ Shortening of breath throughout Hiccup's declarations, he raises his own hands to mirror his hold, cool thumbs brushing temples. He draws them together, nose to nose and forehead to forehead as his voice grows weak and breathy with the loss of so many long, endless years. ]

You can't go away ever again, I won't survive that a second time.

[ He'd rather just not go through the pain of it at all, and turn completely to ice. ]

I won't. I'll wield myself to your hip if I have to.

[He looks so serious when he says that too. Hiccup rubs their noses together, brushing his lips up to kiss the bridge between Jack's nose and eyebrows, then a cheek under his hand, then his chin and pressing a lingering one to his lips, a small hum building up in his chest as he murmurs words of an old song against Jack's mouth.]

I'll swim and sail savage seas with ne'er a fear of drowning. And gladly ride the waves of life, if you will marry me. No scorching sun, nor freezing cold will stop me on my journey. If you will promise me your heart. And love me for eternity.

[ His breaths shudder as he closes his eyes under the kisses and listens, murmuring along to the last couple of lines. If you will promise me your heart, and love me for eternity ... Eyes still shut, he smiles and rubs the height of a cheekbone over Hiccup's, fingers brushing through ruddy locks. ]

Is it pathetic that I just want to stay near you for a while?

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